Christmas was truly joyful. Family, friendships from more than one side of life, and an overabundance of giving that I didn't expect but still thoroughly enjoyed. My family, all sides, is a gift.
I want to spend more time with the horses in the next months. I have a lot to learn, and I don't do it sitting around and listening to jabber. I will still be reading, and now lessons are taking a small priority in my budget and free time, but less talk and more roundpen and saddle will go a long way for me. Talk sometimes scares me, creates doubt, or plants resentment. I always learn things with less talking and more observation.
I am aware I am falling into the trap of replacing buddies and girltime with lax domesticity and Richard. Recently I have worried about this less and become more accepting of the growing boredom and disinterest my friends rightfully show towards me, though in a gentle way. As long as they know I am there for them in times of need, I should be satisfied. I think I am. I'm secure in knowing I am much more than a houseplant, or more secure than I was.
I haven't done a bang-up job on my Raggers goals. In fact, one is pretty much a moot point courtesy of money in my work or personal budgets. But the act of setting goals in and of itself was a positive thing; I will be trying if again.. Eventually. Someday I may develop some Type A tendencies that are beneficial; someday I will be an active planner rather then a passive one.
Good year. Different. But good.
More different from here on out, I suppose.
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Location:Home, in Hunt
